How To Have A Happy Second Marriage
Even though our childhood fairy tales end as soon as the couple gets married, in real life this is probably when the most interesting part of our life’s adventure begins. Sometimes we manage to stick it out with our first choice, but other times, well, we don’t. In the latter event, who says we can’t start again, and that a second marriage may not be our happily ever after?
A Second Marriage May Be Our Happily Ever After If…
Relationships take a lot of energy and sincere effort, but they are necessary for our happiness. If our married life wasn’t exactly rosy the first time around, here’s how we can make our second marriage a better experience.
#1. Be honest and communicate as much as you can.
With half of all first-time marriages in the USA falling apart, there is a lesson to be learned: we need to communicate more and better. If you want your second marriage to work out, don’t make the same mistakes you made with your first one – talk about the things that worry or annoy you instead of bottling things up inside.
#2. Be respectful of your partner.
Even if/ when serious issues emerge, make sure to always address your partner in a way that shows you respect her opinion, even in the cases where you disagree. An argument where you have different opinions does not need to escalate into a fight, it can, in fact, be a great opportunity to resolve an issue peacefully and constructively.
#3. Don’t let other people in your marriage.
Family and friends may be an integral part of our lives, but as much as we cherish and care about them, what goes on between ourselves and our partner is a very personal thing that should stay between the couple. As noble and kind our closed ones’ intentions may be, the truth of the matter is that no one can (or should) know what goes on in our household better than ourselves.
#4. Make time for your partner.
Yes, we all live hectic lives and if children are also part of the family it is even harder to act as a couple sometimes. However, the pillars of the family are the two partners, and they need to find the time to show love and appreciation for each other, even if it means leaving the children behind (at the hands of someone they trust, of course) every once in a while.
#5. Ban ultimatums from your life.
Threatening to leave your partner or end your marriage is not the way to happiness. All you are doing is fostering a sense of mistrust and disbelief and, in essence, weakening your relationship. If something is bothering you, find out the way to get over it as a team.
#6. Don’t make comparisons.
When you have had some bad experiences with your former partner, it can be easy to fall into the trap of fearing the same might happen again, even expecting some of the negative things to happen again. However, making comparisons and expecting the worst are sure-fire ways to hurt your second marriage. You need to put your trust in your new partner and realize that each person is different and that there is a reason you have chosen each other.
Surely, there is no recipe for a happy second marriage, but if your actions are based on love, trust, communication, and respect, you are increasing your and your partner’s chances of being more satisfied and fulfilled in it.