We Are All Guilty Of Relationshopping As We Date
You’ve probably never heard of
Relationshopping Will Never Bring Us Love
1. It’s simply not realistic.
Do you think that you’re going to find the perfect person? The one who will check out all of the boxes in your list? He or she will never exist because there will all have small quirks that could annoy the person we will be with.
2. You are limiting yourself.
When you stick to your list strictly, you are limiting yourself from meeting people who could potentially be of interest to you. Think about a pattern. If the pattern never changes, then things will continue to be as they are. If your list did not work for you in the past, then why should it work for you now?
3. The Hot-Cold Empathy Gap
Experts say that we experience the hot-cold empathy gap as we make decisions. When we are in a rational state (the cold phase), we make concrete decisions that seem logical. We plan out our day, or we list down characteristics of the person we want to meet. However, in our hot phase, our emotions kick in. What we initially planned doesn’t end up happening, or we don’t end up doing them because our emotions are involved.
The best thing to do is to do away with your checklist and stop relationshopping. Your standards need to be there, but you need to be more flexible and give people a chance. When you’re open to moving out of your comfort zone, you might just meet someone interesting enough who is worth your time to get to know. For more dating tips, read other posts on the blog.